Yesterday, I biked 139km from London to Hamilton. It was a perfect fall day. I rode in shorts, a t-shirt, and Vismo workboots.
It was challenging to leave.
I don’t know how much I should share on here. Privacy has been important to me, but it is time to say more. I want this to be an open platform and I’ve got to lead by example:
As I begin to grow out of my youth – and especially because I was just in the place I grew up in – I see more clearly the ways my upbringing shaped me. There is so much fear about the unknown in the house I was raised in; a lack of openness to the path less travelled.
I have struggled dealing with the projection of these feelings.
I am somebody who not only feels comfortable in the unknown, but sees that it is fundamental to who I am.
The expectations of those closest to be something controlable and conforming, coupled with my desire to unshackle, has led me to feel a lot of rejection, judgement and confusion.
I have been hurting.
Very often scared to be who I am.
And that has led me to be less open about the orgins of prawjeckt than I’d like to be.
Though the feeling these days is different.
Like I said, there is a fine line between I can and I can’t…
biking and dreaming
Thinking and than I stop.
—
Sitting in a Hamilton library right now, about to ride to Missisauga. Part of the way, I will have good company.
(sending love to Foster and his family)
Always, Mika
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